peace corps.

i am one resume and three recommendation letters away from completing my peace corps application.

january 2011 could have interesting things for me.

california photos.

here are some landscape/area photos from california. i think all of them were taken on thursday in/around santa cruz. if you want any details, just ask. sorry there are so many. i'll post photos of me/adam soon :)

the picture game!

so i've tried doing this every so often on my livejournal but typically the response is overwhelming and i cannot manage all of them, but i'm goign to try once more!

the picture game!

tell me what you want to see a picture of. anything in my life. where i sleep, my car, my closet, etc. anything anything. i will take pictures of said items and i will post them here in my blog for you to see.

please repost this to YOUR blog so we can continue the game!

*please note that some things are harder to get pictures of than others. but i will try my absolute best :D they should be posted within the next week-ish?! :D

ALSO!
i'm going to answer the remaining questions from the formsprings in the past. if you've come up with something you'd like to ask or tell me, feel free to post it in one of the two formsprings below!

FORMSPRING #1
FORMSPRING #2

xo

ps; if you're shy about leaving a comment below, you can answer the "what would you like to see pictures of" question in the formspring! its anonymous! or you can choose the anonymous option below. but i promise i'm not going to bite! you don't have to be secretive :P

he's not perfect.

You aren’t going to be his first, last or his only. He’s loved before, he will again. But if he loves you now, what else matters? He’s not perfect. You aren’t either. The two of you will never be perfect but if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and admits to being human and making mistakes, hold on to him and give him the most you can. He is not going to quote poetry, he’s not going to be thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you could break. Don’t hurt him, don’t change him, don’t expect more then he can give. Try not to over-analyse. Smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad and miss him when he’s not there.

stress maniaaa!

so today was stress mania. i had to rush to class at 9am, do an entire commercial spot for my ad campaign, work several hours on it, go to web 2 class, then go do my presentation to some dude from an ad agency in nashville. luckily everything went well. just glad it's over. afterwards elle and i went to hobby lobby to get crafty things for the mask decorating party tonight. we went back to school where tons of us (me, elle, merissa, jt, katie, tiff, caitlin & eventually kayla, joanna, ashlea, megan and travis) ordered pizza, watched movies on the giiiiant projector screen in the classroom (the proposal and observe & report), got crafty with our masks, etc. i definitely burned 6 of my fingers AT ONE TIME... 4 of the have blisters on the tips. like, you dont even know how much pain i was in. i cannot use a hot glue gun to save my life. it took me a few hours to make my mask and then i helped merissa construct a dress out of wrapping paper haha. then i headed to the house where i was greeted by 2 inebriated roomies on the back twinkledeck and they engaged me in ridiculous conversation. oh my. now i'm freezign, i wanna crawl in bed and snuggle and get warm. :) tomorrow is my "off" day but i have to steamclean my carpet, clean my room, do my entire web 2 milestone project, and start on flash. always something! i was hoping to sleep in but alas i have a student government meeting to attend so off to bed i go!

this is my masquerade mask! everyone else was doing feathers and sequins and glitter so i decided to take a different approach. of course i'd do an owl! duh! so hopefully it matches my dress (and hopefully my dress fits!) but all should be well. ill take a photo of the final product :)

i love the smell of fresh roses and i definitely have 3 dozen just chillin on my bedside table. :D typically i'm not a fan of roses at all but something about them today just makes me feel in love. its a wonderful thing.

this is what i wore for my presentation today. i wore my hair down and long though, with my lil' signature bow & tulle headband.

dress: Therapy $70
lace shirt: Therapy $60
cardigan: Charlotte Russe $25
tights: H&M $10
flats: Wet Seal $10
belt: Goodwill $1.50

happy tuesday! or well... happy hump day i should say!
xo

edit: i forgot to say... unfortunately adam's mother has taken ill and experienced a stroke this weekend. she has been put in ICU and i'm not sure of her exact current situation but adam flew from san francisco today to las vegas (where shes now living) to be with her in the hospital. please keep her and his whole family in your thoughts and prayers. please send well wishes their way for a speedy recovery and safe travels. he's very distraught about it all and i'm awaiting a phone call for an update. thanks <3

longggggg day.

hey y'allllll! ;)

so amazingly i woke up at 7:30am this morning and was totally unable to go back to sleep. i mean i was wide-eyed and bushy-tailed so i poked around, showered, went about my daily rituals and took my sweet time. i went to campus about 10am even though i dont have class until 1. i have a big advertising campaign due tomorrow and if you follow me on twitter you'll know that i HATE advertising. even though i got an ~"award" for the last project, i despise it. i do NOT want to do advertising ever ever ever! but i had to get through this project and luckily theres only one more for the semester! yesterday i spent time at panera working on it and a new concept came to me. so i ran with it. i did 2 roughs of the concept [its for Happy Tales Humane which is a No-Kill Animal Shelter here in Franklin] and i emailed my professor. i went with the one i liked the look of best and did the entire campaign, minus my tv commercial. well of course i'd get an email this morning from my professor telling me he loved the other one ha. so i had to do an entire campaign around it. but it all worked out because now i have 2 badass campaigns and even if he doesnt let me present both, i will get some mega super extra cred. HOLLA! anyway, i spent 13 hours on campus today... working on advertising. to the point i havent even started on a massive project due thursday and another due on monday. FML!

it'll all work out though. i'll slave away over the next 5 weeks and then i'm going to bask in the glory that is my 5 week christmas vacation. can't come soon enough! tonight it was me, elle, joanna & ashlea and we turned up the music really loud (brace yourself for this... our playlist included: spice girls, enrique iglesias, nelly furtado, kanye west, whitney houston, chamillionaire, etc etc etc) it was epic. we were belting it out, dancing around. so so so much fun. slaving over projects should not be that fun but we all agreed we need to throw a follow up 80's Prom like we had 3 years ago. it was a huge success but this one will be even better!

The Masquerade Ball is on thursday. exciting! i need to make my mask. we're throwing a mask decorating party tomorrow (we really love to throw parties... can't you tell?!) and i'm goign to be an owl! duh! what else would i be aside from a shark?! haha thats if i can get all the stuff to make it in time. i think it will match the dress i wanna wear but we'll see! i bought tonnnnsss of shiny tulle today. im going to get some more fabric and sew some dresses as soon as i get a spare minute. i'll post them if they turn out decent.

right now i'm bummin' it in my hoodie and shorts. i look homeless haha but i dont care. tomorrow is another long day. classes from 9-6:30 so i'll be on campus no later than 8. lordy lordy! if my campaigns go over well i'll show you guys :D i'm pretty happy with them.

this is long and i doubt anyone reads long boring personal entries like this so i'll just say seeeee yaaaaa!

xo

ps; my background on my mac changes every 15 minutes... it switches between two pictures. these are the pictures. how fucking fierce is that?! such contrast. i love it.

SHOW ME YOUR DESKTOPS!
typically mine is wayyy more cluttered.

quotes!

It turned out he wasn’t in love with me like I thought. What I’m trying to say is, I understand feeling as small and insignificant as humanly possible and how it can ache in places you didn’t know you had inside you. And it doesn’t matter how many new haircuts you get, or gyms you join or glasses of champagne you drink with your girlfriends, you still go to bed every night going over every detail and wonder what you did wrong, or how you could’ve misunderstood and how in the hell for that brief moment you could think that you were that happy. And sometimes you can even convince yourself that he’ll see the light and show up at your door and after all that however long all that may be, you’ll go somewhere new and you’ll meet people who make you feel worthwhile again and it’ll be as though your soul will finally come back and all that fuzzy stuff, those years of your life that you wasted will eventually begin to fade.

-----------------

Take wrong turns. Talk to strangers. Open unmarked doors. And if you see a group of people in a field, go find out what they are doing. Do things without always knowing how they’ll turn out. You’re curious and smart and bored, and all you see is the choice between working hard and slacking off. There are so many adventures that you miss because you’re waiting to think of a plan. To find them, look for tiny interesting choices. And remember that you are always making up the future as you go.

-----------------

When you love someone, you’ll do anything you can to keep them with you. Unfortunately, there is also a point when you have to step back and say that it’s time to let go.

— My Sister’s Keeper

-----------------

“I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on and it will be better tomorrow. I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he or she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your family, you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life. I’ve learned that making a living is not the same thing as making a life and I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw something back. I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision and I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one. I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn in life and I’ve learned that people will forget what you said and what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” -Maya Angelou

-----------------

Lost love is still love…it takes a different form, that’s all. You can’t see their smile or bring them food or tousle their hair or move them around a dance floor. But when those senses weaken, another heightens. Memory. Memory becomes your partner. You nurture it. You hold it. You dance with it. Life has to end, love doesn’t.

-----------------

You grieve at the level you loved.

-----------------

When people walk away from you, let them walk. Don’t try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring for you, coming to see you, or staying attached to you. When people walk away, let them walk. Your destiny isn’t tied to anybody that left.

-----------------

Because sometimes there is no easy way out. You just have to grin and bear it. Sometimes the only escape route is to go straight through the flames, just brace yourself and bite your lip. Sometimes you have to sever the ties clean off. Because in every relationship there comes a point when the damage is too much and no matter how good it once was, the memories can’t sustain you. You have to save yourself knowing all the while it will hurt like hell. Because you can’t keep giving someone everything if you get nothing in return.

-----------------

Someday, someone’s going to walk in your life and you’re going to know why it didn’t work out with anyone else.

-----------------

okay! whew! that was long sorry! haha i got a little carried away :P i have tonsssss of photos (like 90!) on my desktop i need to post and clear away (i hate clutter on my computer!) followed by photos from california that i can hopefully get around to on wednesday!

xo

dream home.

this is my dream home.
and i want you to come live in it with me.

question answered!

i just got this in my email from the formspring and since there was no way to reply personally, i figured i'd give it it's own little post on my blog... mainly because it's a really good question and maybe more of you can relate.

This was submitted via the formspring:

"I'll start this off by saying, I've been hesitant on asking you this or not. Not because I don't trust you opinion, but because I feel like it's a bit too personal to question via an internet blog, but after reading your post about you and your boyfriend Adam, I figured I'd give this a shot. Coincidentally, my ex's name is Adam as well. But, all in all we dated for 4 years, and just recently actually about 2 months ago "recently" we had to break up due to family/personal problems. Plus, a but load of other issues. Nontheless, the question i was inquiring, was how did you get over your Adam when you needed to? I've heard the whole " find something to occupy yourself with " deal. and Time Time Time, just give it time. I'm sorry this is so long, but I'm in desperate need to know how to get over him. I've been puttin one foot in front o!
f the other these past few months, but I always seem to have set backs around the corners. Sorry if this took too much of your time. I just figured you could relate. Thanks in advance, :)"

alllrighty then! well! this will probably be long-winded so i dont blame some of you for not reading it. hopefully i can touch base with the person who asked the question and maybe the rest of you can leave advice/suggestions in the comments for her! i think this is a great way to open up discussion with more than just myself :)

first things first... i'm sorry that you're going through this. it's never fun and it's never easy, and it sucks when you've spent that significant amount of time with someone. i'll never claim to give good advice, but i will say i can give you my experiences and what i would (emphasis on WOULD seeing as i typically do the opposite of what i SHOULD hehe) do in the situation. my adam and i dated for 2 full years before we went separate ways. they were 2 of the most influential years of both of our lives basically. we lived together for over a year so that definitely sped up the relationship. after 24 months it seemed as though we had been together 5 years. we didnt split because of family problems so i can't relate there, but there were a ton of personal problems that just eventually drove us apart. for exactly one month after we "broke up" we stayed together. after that 1 month i walked away completely. we'd go days/weeks without speaking/seeing each other (the longest was 6 weeks. no communication whatsoever.) through all the trials and tribulations of trying to get over my "first love" i came to this conclusion: if i really wanted to get over him, i'd have to cut him out of my life completely. thats not to say i actually ever wanted to do that... the problem for me was right there... i never wanted to actually get over him. sure, he pissed me off and hurt me to certain extents where i swore i hated his guts, but i never really TRULY did, ya know? i dated several guys over the course of the 11 months we were technically broken up, but i still compared every single one of them to him. i could go on and on and on about this but its really as simple as just try and get him out of your daily routine/mind for a while. its hard and you'll catch yourself watching the phone, possibly lurking via the web (PLEASE DONT DO THIS! THIS IS BAD!), etc etc... but if you just delete him from everything, make everything private and try to avoid crossing paths, it'll get easier and easier each day. every single day for the 6 weeks, i thought of adam. a lot. i cried, a lot. but i needed to. you need to let yourself feel those feelings ya know? don't ignore them. don't just brush them off. acknowledge them and move past them. when you sweep it under the rug you'll just end up with a pile of shit when it comes down to doing the cleaning. then who knows, maybe after just a littttle bit of time you'll be able to be cordial, friendly, and maybe see where things go from there.

it sucks to say it but the truth is this: you've got to get rid of him. theres a lot of life left in you, babygirl. there's a whole world to see. as cheesy as it is to say, i found reading a lot of quotes and listening to a lot of ridiculous (and sometimes sappy) music to help me. thats just how i operate though. reading and listening to somethign that someone else might think is sad can actually help put me in a better mood (simply because its nice not to feel alone. and when i read/listen to those things, i realize that other people out there are fighting the daily battles with me.) so ill post a few quotes and stuff like that that i've come across just to put them out there :) im sure several of them will be repeats but some things are good to hear more than once <3

xo

if you want to talk about it some more or anything, feel free to email me (kaelahbee@gmail.com). you can make a fake email if you'd prefer to stay anonymous. but i'm all ears [or... eyes, i guess i should say :P] hang in there lady <3 you're not alone.

You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read. It was books that taught me that the things that tormented me most were the very things that connected me with all the people who were alive, or who had ever been alive.

— James Baldwin

worrrrk!

this photo makes me happy. its a screenshot of my iphone wallpaper. yay! now im off to see bry before work and then im headed to the bar. long night ahead of me. blah! tomorrow i REALLY need to do advertising. then ill post more fun updates and i have a TONNNNN of photos to post! yay!

xo

exciting!

you can now find this blog at kaelahbee.com

AND LITTLECHIEFHONEYBEE.COM!

i'll have forwarding taken off of kaelahbee.com once i get my actual site up and running, but until then it'll say double-hosted with the domains. update your bookmarks if needed! if you read through blogger or google reader you'll be fine :D

don't let this confuse you! you will still be able to access the exact same site at the url of kaelahbee.com! at least for the time being :) i just went ahead and bought the little chief domain so others wouldn't jack it, too :)

xo

mixtape! double whammy!

i had an overwhelmingly awesome response from my first mixtape i posted (the one i made for adam, titled "you were made for me...") so i decided to do a few more! i currently have 3 done, but i only have the album art done for 2 of them so ill go ahead and post these. some of these songs are a little bit older but they're all zipped up conveniently in ONE zip file! yay! so now you dont have to download each song individually! it'd be cool if you could comment if you take them, as i have them hosted on my sendspace account, but it's whatever! enjoy!

KANSAS: A MIXTAPE
(click on the title to download!)

PART ONE: A MIXTAPE
(click on the title to download!)
** disclaimer: apparently the bob dylan song needs a password, MY BAD, Y'ALL! ill try to fix it asap <3

enjoy! xo

first things first....

this is my pissed off face.

okay for a little small small update!

+ i changed the blog header. once more. going by my ~myspace name. i know, cliche, whatever.

+ tweaked the CSS coding to make the page 200 pixels wider. do you like it or hate it? i prefer a wider page... but i AM working on a 17" widescreen macbook pro soooo it may be too wide for someone with a smaller resolution. (the main writing area is now 580px as opposed to 430..) do you like it thinner or wider?

+ tweaked the colors in the layout. finally. the header now matches the background. long overdue.

+ getting irritated because some girl went and took "little chief honeybee" on every single social networking site... oh, and to top it off she THEN went and added my boyfriend on twitter. WTF? i know you read this, little girl. i know you're lurking the shit. stop it. so annoying.

+ "imitation is the sincerest form of flattery" ORLY?! no. no it's not.

+ i probably shouldn't get so worked up about it but i'm just really irritated at a bunch of my shit making it's way around the circle of the internet but every single person that is using it is claiming it as their own. pictures are one thing (and a creepy thing at that) but when you have the gall to jack someone's about me (as trivial as it may seem) or something, thats just lame. you can jack all the intellectual property you want, but you can't have my boyfriend :)

+ pardon my language, but dear girl, kindly go fuck yourself.

+ its saturday. its a work day. i'm tired. i'm grumpy. it's cold.

xo

questions and answers!

here they are! several of the questions that were submitted in the formsprings answered! i didnt answer all of them... i'll save a few for the next time around, etc.. but if you want to ask anything just visit the formsprings below and ask away. its anonymous. :) sorry the formatting on these are sloppy. i just copied & pasted from textEdit :)

How did becoming "popular" (I hate using that word, but I can't think of another word for this) on MySpace and being in Seventeen magazine affect you? What I really mean is, how did it all start?
man oh man what a good question. honestly, i don't know. it's really strange. i've had myspace for going on 6 years i think (december 03, holla!) so i've been around. back in the day in my tee-tiny town we had nothing better to do than sit on this awesome new website. i took it way too serious for far too long but i'd go to nashville and people would recognize me and be all "omg you're kaelah from myspace".. it got to where i just said "nope, i've heard of myspace but i don't have one" ha. i'm not sure how the whole seventeen thing came about. all i remember is that i had an email in my inbox at 3:30am one morning and i was getting ready to jet off to california saying i was a finalist. i was like "HUH?" and it went from there. its cool to get adds and emails from girls saying they've cut out my picture and it's hanging in their room or something, or that i'm some sort of inspiration. thats really all i've ever wanted.. not some crazy silly for-nothing internet fame. i don't consider myself e-popular or e-famous. i just do what i do and hope that people can enjoy it. if not, its just not your cup o' tea :D i'm inspired by normal every day girls just as much as the next person so its really flattering. but i wont lie, the "popularity" has its perks. lots of opportunities and doors open up that otherwise i'm not sure i'd have a chance at. so it balances itself out :)

what ever happened with that girl you were friends with/lived with who was getting married?
they got married at the end of july as planned, but i backed out of the wedding. i think everyone agreed it was for the best. the last i spoke to her was probably the end of august as we were finishing up details on our apartment but as far as i know, they're happily married and living in memphis. i sent them nothing but well wishes and i hope that married life is treating them well :)

i know you've always gotten good grades and seem to always be really on top of your work. how do you stay motivated in school?? i just started college at 23, i haaaaated highschool and refused to ever go to college but i realized i needed it...at fist i was doing really well but i'm feeling myself starting to slip.
this is definitely a topic for discussion currently. i've been faltering in my focus and motivation as of late. high school came easy to me. nothing was challenging really so i just kind of breezed through. college (at art school) is way different from a traditional college so i don't have to take classes i find incredibly boring, etc. i guess that helps. except for right now i'm in an advertising class that makes me want to scream bloody murder, so its impossible for me to do those projects apparently. i just try to keep in mind its something i'm going to be doing for the rest of my life so i might as well learn what i can while i can. at least before i'm thrown out on my butt and told to fend for myself :P

Why/how did you decided to be vegetarian and then vegan? Were there any foods that you liked that you had to give up? I personally am part time vegetarian, as in eat mostly veggies for health reasons and I'll eat meat every once in a while. What are your favorite vegan dishes?
i was vegetarian for like five years throughout high school and after, etc, but i'd be off and on and off again. my best friend shannon has been vegan for almost a year now and i've tried going vegan alone but i was totally ignorant in the matter so when she and i went on a long roadtrip at the beginning of august, it opened my eyes to a lot of things that are vegan and its not AS hard as one might think. (granted, its still insanely hard and less than convenient). it helps having someone thats a little more knowledgeable and informed to help you along the way. there were far too many things i hated to give up but by far the worst was my mom's chocolate gravy breakfast. you just don't even know :P and i love vegan pasta bakes so gimmie some pasta and some fresh veggies (zucchini, squash, red pepper) and i'm golden :D oh oh oh and also!!! Isa Chandra Moskowitz has a new article in every issue of BUST magazine (the mag i work for in NYC, it comes out every other month) and she's the author of SO many amazing vegan recipe books! you should look her up!

Have you traveled anywhere?
i have been to ten or eleven countries in europe (hungary, austria, switzerland, france, lichtenstein, germany, netherlands just to name a few) and all over the united states. i've lived in new york city and practically northern california apart from nashville. i love love love to travel.

What are some of your favourite websites? Not like social network sites, or tfln, but like blogs, and inspiration, and stuff. Do you have any favourites? or could you just link to some?
i just poke around tumblr a lot… ill go in the directory and click "quotes" or "love" or something and just jump from one tumblr to another. it's hands down the best go-to place. i also use ffffound.com and weheartit.com like no other. no specific blogs off the top of my head but also lookbook.nu :D

What is it like living in Tennesse? i've always wanted to go to the southern states ^_^
i love tennessee. its really unlike any other place. i realized it today in the plane when flying over. it just LOOKS different from other states you know? loveeeee. rolling hills, lots of trees, beautiful in the autumn. the weather can get you though! gah! hot then cold then humid and sticky sticky sticky! but i love just sitting in my room or on the twinkledeck with the doors ope and you can hear the bugs chirping. and the southern hospitality is one thing you grow oh so accustomed to.

What do you think was the best thing that you have ever done?
moving to new york city by myself. hands down. i learned so much about myself, my goals, my friends and family and just life outside of my little bubble here in tennessee. and as much as i hate to say it, it was the best thing ever that i did it while single. i wasn't attached to anyone back home. i was constantly relying on another person to pull me through my rough days. instead, i just dove head first into it. moved into an apartment in a part of town i'd never stepped foot in. never met my roommates prior… just did it. i wouldn't change a thing.

Do you have any phobias?
not really, although i'm PETRIFIED of spiders. a;dfjkals;dfjl;adsfj;aside. don't even get me started!

Who is your favourite charecter on the office?
andy probably. he's just…. andy. i love creed, too. and kevin. oh man don't make me choose!

would you judge someone with a skin condition?
oh my goodness, no. i realize it's almost impossible for any one person to be completely nonjudgmental and prejudice but i can safely say that i find nothing to judge in something like a skin condition. :) promise!

can we be bffs?
yes! but first you have to tell me who you are ;) i can't have an imaginary bff :P

are you a vegetarian?
no, i'm a vegan. i was vegetarian for 4 or 5 years through high school and after. i went back to eating meat for a little while after i had some health problems (i was a vegetarian but still wasn't eating healthy. i lacked a lot of essential nutrients and this made my immune system total crap.) i went vegan a few months back because my best friend shannon is also vegan. i find it to be much easier to transition into when you're not alone. it's very daunting and intimidating but she's been vegan for almost a year now so she's the go-to person for any of my questions :)

What do you hope to do once you graduate college?
this is a good question. it's one i've been playing around with a lot in my head recently. graduation is so close (december 2010!) and i feel like i'm totally unprepared for the world. the plan is to graduate with a bachelor of fine arts in visual communications (graphic design) and just basically go from there. i intern at BUST magazine in new york city during the summers so i'm crossing my fingers and praying that they may offer me a job after next summer (please cross yours for me! :D) because my heart is 110% in that publication. i love magazines and editorial layouts so i'd love to snag a job there as i've been doing for the summer. the women are amazing and new york city is my second (well, third) home city. however, if they just don't have room for me by january or may 2011, i've toyed with the idea of going back to college for a completely unrelated degree (marine biology!). granted if i were to do this i'd probably move to northern california to be with my boyfriend (he's in the bay area). i'm also looking at other magazines in new york city and san francisco to try and hit up :) BUT! my third choice is a quite exciting one… provided that the economy allots me the ability to do this, i may join the Peace Corps. it's something i've wanted to do since i was a tot and to have the ability to do humanitarian work and travel… it just sounds amazing. i'd have to commit 2+ years but i could always go through a different organization, too. we'll see! oh my, sorry for the long-winded answer! i just get so excited when i think about my future :D

How did you get into art?
funny story actually… in kindergarten i hated coloring… i mean i loathed coloring. my teacher actually spoke to my mom about it and my mom told her plain and simple "make her do her coloring sheets and make her do them right." sure enough i remember the day EXACTLY… i was coloring a christmas tree and ornaments and i just scribbled all over it, walked up to the teacher's desk and turned it in. she was not pleased. she sent me straight back to my seat to color in the lines perfectly and not bring it back until every inch of the picture was painted with a hue. my mom started working with me after classes in coloring books and drawing squirrels (silly!) but i started really taking to it and then all i ever wanted to do was draw and paint and make things pretty. i owe all of it to my dear mother and my awesome kindergarten teacher.

When did you meet Adam?
i met adam 5 years ago when i was 16 or so. i was with shannon and our friend chris at the movies. we ran into him in the parking lot and he was with his friends. we ended up talking to them and we all decided to go to walmart (we were in a small town). we all just hung out and junk but the funny thing is i remember totally NOOOOTTTT liking adam at all. i didn't think he was cute, i thought he was immature, etc. he was spraying stuff on the floor and sliding around in walmart, etc. we became friends on myspace but rarely spoke to each other. 2 years later i moved to his town (he was an hour and a half away from my hometown) and we had a mutual best friend. he kept trying to hang out with me and i would just blow him off continually. i really had no desire to hang out with him. then one night i was going to hang out with our mutual friend johnny b and he was with him so one thing lead to another and we were all 3 hanging out at steak n shake, hanging out at my place and johnny b's, then going to the park. adam and i hit it off pretty immediately and that was almost 3 years ago to the day (november 3rd!)… now look at us. basically 3 years into a relationship, we've lived together for over a year, and now we're doing the long-distance thing. amazing.

Why do you enjoy traveling so much?
i don't have a real answer for this aside from the fact i just never want to look back on my life and say "i wish i would have done that when i had the chance"… once i graduate college and get a "real job" in the "real world" i'll have to sacrifice the 3+ months of summer vacation and trade it in for MAYBE 1 or 2 weeks of down-time… and if i'm living in new york city or san francisco, the likelihood that i'll even be able to afford it is fairly nonexistent. so i jump at every opportunity now. i like to be cultured (even though that sounds silly). i've been to many cities i could see myself living in. honestly, if i could learn hungarian, i'd pack up and move to budapest. such a beautiful place. but then again it'd be too hard to leave my mother that far behind. new york city is rough as it is. i can't imagine adding 3,000 miles to that.

Where do you shop for clothes?
all the same stores as everyone else, honest. therapy, urban outfitters, forever 21, charlotte russe, goodwill, salvation army, wasteland vintage in san francisco, promod when i'm in europe. :D


Is it tough living on your own? Do you pay your bills and stuff, like your phone, rent, car, etc? I was just wondering because you only work on the weekends it seems. I just dunno how I would be able to afford living on my own and bills when I do only work on weekends.
i'm very fortunate to have the job that i do. i only work 10 hours a week (friday & saturday nights 9pm till 2am) and its a 45 minute drive each way. i've been bartending for 3 and a half years now. crazy! it sucks to give up every single weekend but its so worth it because its balances school and i can still afford to live my kind of lifestyle off those 10 hours. i wont go into too much detail like how much i make, etc, but the job i currently have gives me more money per year that 75% of people that are starting out after graduating college (i'm still going to graduate college, and possibly go back for a second unrelated degree, but it sucks to know that one day i'll have to give up the job that allows me so much financial freedom. i don't know how i'll make the switch ha) but not only that, my parents are amazing. they don't pay my way by ANY means! i've paid absolutely EVERYTHING on my own since i was 16 and got my first job. thats just how i am. i could never take hand-outs from my parents. it just feels liberating to be able to pay for myself and to be an adult in teh world ya know? i pay my rent, my cellphones (both iphone and sidekick), i pay for all of my school books, all of my clothes, all of my plane tickets, etc. the only thing i DONT pay for is my car. i drive a 2006 solstice convertible and it was my graduation present for graduating from high school in '06. thats the only thing my parents pay for. i've offered to take over payments (so i can trade it in for a Land Rover LR3) but my parents wont let me haha they're always willing and eager to help me if i need it, but i've never asked them for help :)

What made you and Adam get back together?
honestly, i think there's more to adam and i than just bullshit fights and third-party encounters. we needed that break up last november more than anything. it was something that HAD to happen. he needed to experience life as a single party-goer boy and do all of his boy things just like i needed to experience life as a single girl from a small town moving to the big apple. i had to find myself and so did he. we both got lost in exboyfriends and girlfriends and partying and all of that rite-of-passage stuff you read about. but after it was all said and done, we realized that we didn't need those things anymore and we were really really in love, that the two of us together put any of that partying and drug stuff to shame. i'm genuinely grateful for our experiences both together and separate. all that matters now is if we can share our pasts with one another in hopes that it will make for a better present and future. no one understands me like he does, and vice versa. we've definitely picked up a lot of slack for our attempts at reuniting but at the end of the day all that matters is that he and i are happy. screw everything else. :) another thing that really contributed in the breaking up/making up was we were SO young when we started dating. 17 and 18 years old. he lived at home with his parents and i had lived on my own for just over a year when we decided to get an apartment together. our parents actually suggested it. so he moved out of his parents and we got a place in franklin where we lived together for over a year. if youv'e never lived with your significant other, let me be the one to tell you things age QUICK. just over a year felt like 5 because we were basically a married couple. we went to work together, went to sleep together, ate every meal together, etc. for over a year. the break let us get ahold of our own lives again. we're more comfortable than ever with each other, but it feels new again. its nice.

i'm home!

adam and i at natural bridges in santa cruz, california yesterday.

hey guys! i'm home! can't say that i'm too thrilled about it.. especially as i'm greeted by a terrorized room (thanks baby G), a broken $160 betsey johnson laptop bag (ugh!), and the fact i have to work tonight... it was an uneventful trip from foggy san francisco to nashville today. from waking up at 3am to switching planes in denver, i'm just glad i'm here safe and i wish i was with adam. i have so many errands to run right now and a sick best friend to go console so i will post a few entries later! dont forget i've got a bunch of those drafts so i'll be spitting them out with TONS of photos. hooray!

xo

Update!

Hello my loves! Sorry for being MIA! As most of you know I'm in California visiting my boyfriend for the week so I've had little time to update! Today is my last full day here and I fly back to the homeland at sunrise. Today we are heading to Santa Cruz and we are going to eat lunch on the boardwalk and beach. It shall be lovely! Anywhoo, I'm updating from my iPhone so I won't make this long! I answered all the questions submitted in my formspring so I'll post the entry as soon as I get Internet on my mac :) if you wanna ask anything else just use the formspring in the entry below! <3 au revoir my babiesss!

xo

formsprings & planes!

i'm going to be on several planes today, several airports, layovers, etc etc. i'm going to draft out a bunch of entries, make playlists and upload them so i can share, etc. but i'm lame and i'm lacking in material for updates. i have questions from previous formsprings that i'm going to answer and elaborate on today on the plane, so if you want to ask me anything, just click on the formsprings below to do so! you can ask anything you want, and provided its not too incredibly personal, i will answer it here on my blog. :) also there are questions about what you want to see more/less of in the blog, etc. don't worry, its completely anonymous.

FORMSPRING #1

FORMSPRING #2

off i go to finish packing! woohoo!

ps; i'm excited about this weather! no more tennessee cold! hay california!

photo dump.

baby G at the vet.

art history makes me sleepy, too.

this is how she sleeps. every night.

she likes her little octopus just like her mommy :)

buying new dresses. always.

skinny jeans. ive never worn them before. although i do own one or two other pairs. i've got ~hipz like texas so i typically shy away from such clothing. plus i rarely wear jeans. but the fall air was calling for them so whatever. i'm no size 2 and that's not a secret. so i'm just going to wear them fiercely. :)

excited to break out the cropped yellow coat!

nerdy.

all of my photos from work look the same.


hokay!
xo